Words Left Unsaid
by Secret Companion
Summary: Learning of Melissa's Death. Alistair Breaks.


Alistair awoke with a jolt, his ribs screaming in protest with the sudden movement. The last thing he remembered was the sickening sound of his bones snapping from the impact of the ground. He scanned his surroundings, the only sound in the room being a crackle from the fire sending an orange glow across the room. Where am I? he thought to himself. Not Denerim surely things would still be chaotic had they failed. Wait where was Melissa? She should be here. With confusion and a bit of panic he put his legs over the side of the bed he laid on. Ignoring the way his vision swam he got up and groaned from the pain his ribs were making.

The door opened suddenly with Leliana coming through with Zevran at tow. They quickly went each of Alistair's sides.

"Where is she?" he rasped out.

They sat him back on the bed and stood around awkwardly reluctant to speak. Alistair turned his head to Leliana, then to Zevran. He eyed them both, something was wrong.

He repeated more sternly "Where. Is. She?"

He looked to Zevran who had his eyes to the floor. Leliana came to his side, sat next to him and looked at him with tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

She cast her eyes to the floor and spoke softly "When the archdemon threw you to the ground you were incapable of ending his life. Melissa was the only warden left who could finish it" She took in a deep breath and wiped a stray tear from her cheek and continued "I'm sorry Alistair, she... she's dead."

Alistair shook his head not wanting to believe what he was hearing; they had just talked and were deciding who would be the one to make the sacrifice. It would be him. It was supposed to be him. This couldn't be happening. With the thought in mind he looked at Zevran whose eyes were still cast downward.

Alistair stood up from the bed and came over to him. His words were soft and calm, too calm. "You were there. Why didn't you stop her?"

Zevran looked up into his eyes and he didn't see anything. An emptiness behind his light brown eyes that were once full of life.

Though his eyes betrayed him, his words were a different story.

"Our dear warden was the dashing hero of the story; she'll be in stories for years to come." His smile didn't reach his eyes.

With that Alistair lost it, pushing Zevran against the wall and ignoring the protest of his ribs he trapped Zevrans throat with his forearm.

"Don't you dare make light of this." Alistair shouted at the wide eyed elf. "She saved you from death and let you join us on our journey. You pledged your loyalty to her. You could have saved her!"

Zevran choked out the words as his oxygen was being shortened from the pressure. "When has Melissa ever listened to any of us Alistair? When her mind is set it stays"

Alistair hit Zevrans head against the wall and continued to shout. Leliana was starting to come over to pull Alistair off when Zevran put his hand up to stop her.

"You...you could have stopped her." Alistairs voice faltered as a tear ran down his cheek. You could have tried."

The tension on Zevrans neck released slightly and he put his right hand on Alistairs and looked into his tear filled eyes.

No longer bothering to hide his true feelings Zevran sighed and replied "I wanted to but Wynne wouldn't have let me and someone had to stop the blight. I'm sorry."

Alistair's knees gave in and he collapsed to the floor. He covered his face in his hands and started to sob uncontrollably. Leliana rushed to his side and tried to comfort him as best as she could rubbing light circles on his back. Zevran rubbed the front of his neck then kneeled in front of him waiting for him to hopefully calm down some.

After a few minutes alistairs breathing was hard and his words were a whisper and his voice was raspy.

"I love her. I always will. I can't. She can't just be gone."

Zevran was the person to voice his thoughts.

"I know how you feel." he lightly chuckled "Loving her was complicated and was hard but you wanted to do everything you could to make her happy."

Alistair raised his head to look at Zevran who had moved to sit against the wall looking up.

"You...you loved her?" he said shocked

Zevran looked at Alistair eyes full of truth and not a hint of his usually sarcasm.

"Indeed. You were a lucky man to have her as long as you did Alistair. Never forget it."

With that Zevran got up and left the room to a wide eyed Alistair and leliana.

In the next few days there was a funeral for Melissa. All of her companions were lined up, except for Zevran and Morrigan. He could swear he was watching from somewhere. There was also a crow perched on a branch of a tree that had golden eyes that resembled Morrigans cat eyed eyes a little to well to be a coincidence.

The king of fereldan was the on to honor her farewell.

"My friends" Alistair began "we are gathered here today to pay our respects to the grey warden that saved us all. She gave her life to destroy the blight, a sacrifice we must never forget. It was no accident she was there either. She was special, and each of us had our life touched by her in some way."

Alistair stopped took a breath and continued.

"I...I thought we would be together forever. The grey wardens couldn't ask for anyone finer. How do you properly honor someone like that? The grey wardens are building magnificent tomb at Weisshaupt, right next to Garahel's, but I'd like to something as well."

Alistair looked into the crowd until he spotted who he was looking for.

"Fergus Cousland" he announced "Please step forward."

He stepped in front of the king and the stone where Melissa's body laid.

"We were very pleased to discover you alive; your sister thought you died at Ostagar."

Fergus look down at his sister then up to the king.

In a sad tone he replied "I only wish I had recovered from my wounds sooner."

They discussed of high ever and of the Amaranthine Arling of Arl Howes. Fergus decided to give Amaranthine to the Wardens.

Alistair gave Melissa one last look and gave the ending of his speech.

"Friends, let us hope that she has gone to a better place and that she knows just how thankful we are for what she has done here."

He gave a sorrowful look as he said his last sentence to her body.

"You will be missed. More than I can possibly say."

Everybody began to leave. If you paid attention to your surroundings you could see the crow fly away. Looking to the roofs of the buildings above you would see a charming blonde elf arched in a kneeling form but only for a second because then he would be lost to the shadows.

Years after Melissa's death Alistair was still in turmoil, he never loved again. Eamon wanted him to remarry and brought many potential suitors around but none would ever steal a smile from him and he would never give a second thought. No one would ever compare to his warden. He put on a smile for the people of Fereldan but they saw the broken soul that lied behind his brown eyes. He was a great King, and ruled until his calling. When Alistair went into the deep roads to fight the darkspawn for one last time he smiled. He'd be reunited with the love of his life again in the void beyond.


End file.
